How can you “intentionally” hurt someone you say you love?

I often wonder if people really know what love is. Any time somebody tells me that they love me but their actions do not line up with loving me, I always tell them that love is an action word. When you love somebody, you don’t want to hurt them. You want what is best for them and you want to protect them. So I say, if you are intentionally hurting someone that you claim you love, you must not love them at all.

I am not saying that I have not hurt somebody that I love. What I am saying is, if I did hurt them, it definitely wasn’t intentional. Because I loved them so much, I felt pretty terrible about the fact that I hurt them and I always tried to make it right. I have never tried to hurt somebody because they hurt me. If I did that, wouldn’t that be considered intentionally hurting them? I loved them too much to see them hurt.

I have experienced a significant other trying to cause me hurt because they felt I hurt them. That was their philosopy, “if you do something to me, then I am going to do something to you.” This was just crazy to me. Even if I explained to them that I didn’t mean to hurt them or I didn’t even know I hurt them, they would still retaliate by intentionally hurting me. They claimed, they loved me though. I don’t believe you can really love someone and intentionally hurt them. It just doesn’t make sense to hurt somebody you are suppose to love.

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